Episode 9 of AEW Dark from Chicago, Illinois featured staple gun shenanigans from Jimmy Havoc, a spike piledriver from Shawn Spears and Tully Blanchard, and a big man showdown between Jake Hager and Luchasaurus.
Here’s the lineup with ratings (watch, okay, pass) on which matches are worth your time:
- Jimmy Havoc vs Brandon Cutler (pass)
- Shawn Spears vs Sonny Kiss (pass)
- Santana & Ortiz vs Jurassic Express (pass)
- Post-main event showdown between Jake Hager and Luchasaurus (watch)
All three matches were fine with fun moments but nothing I would consider important viewing. Watch the show here.
Dasha Gonzalez returned this week to join Tony Schiavone from the control center to host. Shanna was supposed to join Excalibur on commentary, but she was powerbombed through a table by Nyla Rose before the show. Rose ended up replacing her on commentary.
Jimmy Havoc vs Brandon Cutler
Brandon Cutler had a cool entrance, but then I noticed the goose egg in his win column. That didn’t look cool. Cutler redeemed himself with a big swinging slam.
.@BranCutler takes Havoc for a spin! #AEWDark
— TDE Wrestling (@tde_wrestling) December 4, 2019
➡️ https://t.co/2wd4XN1Zb0 pic.twitter.com/FAT5TeSCq9
Other highlights include Cutler jumping over the top rope for a guillotine leg drop on the apron and a springboard elbow drop by Cutler. The winning move was an Acid Rainmaker by Jimmy Havoc.
During the bout, commentary mentioned how Havoc had been fined for using a staple gun in the past. After the match, Havoc took out a staple gun to attach a check for that $10,000 fine onto the forehead of Cutler.
Check, please! @JimmyHavoc #AEWDark
— TDE Wrestling (@tde_wrestling) December 4, 2019
➡️ https://t.co/2wd4XN1Zb0 pic.twitter.com/T7Ih23kyoK
The very next segment was Cutler and an AEW agent confronting Havoc backstage about that dastardly deed. The agent threatened to fine Havoc again. Havoc stated that they signed a liability when they signed him. Basically, he’ll do whatever he wants. Havoc stapled the check to the wall on his way out.
Shawn Spears vs Sonny Kiss
Tully Blanchard accompanied Shawn Spears. Top highlight was Spears flexing his butt cheeks to mock Sonny Kiss’ claim to fame. That earned a 10 from Nyla Rose. For the finish, Spears softened Kiss up on the floor then won with a Death Valley driver in the ring. Afterward, Tully whispered in Spears’ ear. Spears set Kiss up for a spike piledriver on the floor with Tully jumping off the ring steps.
TULLY. #AEWDark
— TDE Wrestling (@tde_wrestling) December 4, 2019
➡️ https://t.co/2wd4XN1Zb0 pic.twitter.com/UGQ4n8SYOL
Lots of recap in this episode to promote Wednesday night’s Dynamite. One new clip was Christopher Daniels crashing a Lucha Bros backstage interview to scuffle with Pentagon. Swear words aplenty in Spanish from the one with Cero Miedo.
Santana & Ortiz vs Jurassic Express
Jungle Boy and Marko Stunt represented Jurassic Express. Top highlight was Jungle Boy using Stunt as a battering ram on a spear in the corner.
.@boy_myth_legend has really mastered the "Throw Marko at everybody" offense! #AEWDark
— TDE Wrestling (@tde_wrestling) December 4, 2019
➡️ https://t.co/2wd4XN1Zb0 pic.twitter.com/2a19C8oyNM
Other big moves were a dropkick into German suplex teamwork move by Santana and Ortiz, a teamwork trade-off delayed vertical suplex by Santana & Ortiz, and a step-up cannonball senton by Santana using Ortiz’s back onto the seated baby and boy.
Pull up a seat or two with @Santana_Proud! #AEWDark
— TDE Wrestling (@tde_wrestling) December 4, 2019
➡️ https://t.co/2wd4XN1Zb0 pic.twitter.com/QqKmexccpM
For the finish, Santana caught a flying rana attempt from Stunt and turned it into an overhead facebuster slam. A Liger bomb by Ortiz and a big boot by Santana led to a pin on Stunt.
After the match is when business picked up. Sammy Guevara came down for some vlogging as the Inner Circle trio put the boots to their fallen opponents. Luchasaurus made the save with big kicks. He crushed Ortiz on a chokeslam and standing moonsault.
Jake Hager came down to the ring for a showdown with Luchasaurus. Clothesline by Hager. No effect to Luchasaurus. Kick by Luchasaurus. No effect to Hager. Another round with no effect. Luchasaurus ducked the third clothesline then goozled Hager. That’s when the 4-on-1 numbers game went into effect for the Inner Circle. The Young Bucks ran down to even the odds. Guevara ended up taking a couple of finishers to close the show.
Deploy the Tactical @realmarkostunt! #AEWDark
— TDE Wrestling (@tde_wrestling) December 4, 2019
➡️ https://t.co/2wd4XN1Zb0 pic.twitter.com/fGDMWs4fMt
Nyla Rose on commentary was the star of this episode. Her lowbrow sense of humor (laughing at doody when duty was said) and penchant for twisting reality to defend heel tactics (claiming Havoc’s stapler was a single slice toaster) were right up my alley of enjoyment. She even mocked Excalibur as Porky Pig when he accidentally stuttered. After hearing more of Rose’s personality, I think she would be a perfect fit in the Inner Circle as their women’s division representative.
The showdown between Jake Hager and Luchasaurus was interesting. I enjoyed it, but it could have been so much more of a big moment. Having it on Dark doesn’t seem like savvy business. I believe that was the first time they engaged in blows, and it was used on an internet show instead of national television. AEW should have built up to that moment to eventually blow the roof of the building.
One negative issue with the main event is that it took too long watching the Jurassic B squad get beat up in the first half. I would have preferred that bout to be shorter and extra time given to Sonny Kiss for a chance to shine against Shawn Spears. Kiss can be a star, but he wasn’t given much opportunity in that match.
Final two thoughts. I wonder how Tully Blanchard will get comeuppance for his role in the spike piledrivers. I also wonder if Jimmy Havoc’s anti-establishment personality will eventually lead to a stable with Jon Moxley, Darby Allin, and Joey Janela. All four of them seem to share similar mindsets.
Who stood out most in the ring for episode 9 of AEW Dark? Do you think Nyla Rose has a future on commentary? What’s your opinion about the Hager vs Luchasaurus fisticuffs not coming on national TV?
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